Plaintiff 5e
Sure, accidents happen. But they seem to happen an awful lot when Acquisitions Incorporated operatives are on the scene. Naturally, nothing ever happens when there are no witnesses left behind. But sometimes one casualty is left a little less than dead, just waiting to discover what a lucky break that accident actually was.
You were a victim of a legal incident that was ostensibly the fault of Acquisitions Incorporated. At least that's what the local magistrate said. But before a final ruling could be handed down. Acquisitions Incorporated offered you a job! Don't know how to swing a sword? They promised to teach you! Think you have what it takes to sling spells? They've got masters who'll have you throwing fire in no time!
With the promise of untold treasures and realms of magic and mystery just a dungeon away, you left your old life behind. Now a world of adventure is yours. Just initial here and sign here and here. Absolve Acq Inc of all former claims, and acknowledge you understand past outcomes don't guarantee future results.
Source: Acquisitions Incorporated
Skill Proficiencies: Medicine, Persuasion
Tool Proficiencies: One type of artisan's tools
Languages: Any one of your choice
Equipment: One set of artisan's tools, a set of fine clothes, and 20 gp
Feature
Legalese: Your experience with your local legal system has given you a firm knowledge of the ins and outs of that system. Even when the law is not on your side, you can use complex terms like ex injuria jus non oritur and cogitationis poenam nemo patitur to frighten people into thinking you know what you're talking about. With common folks who don't know any better, you might be able to intimidate or deceive to get favors or special treatment.
Suggested Characteristics
Plaintiffs come in many varieties. Some are innocent bystanders who want only fair compensation for their injuries. Others are professional courtroom operatives, going to extreme lengths to appear wronged in pursuit of a large payout.
Plaintiff Personality Trait
| d8 | Personality Trait |
|---|---|
| 1 | I can't believe I have a chance to join Acquisitions Incorporated! The fun I'm going to have! |
| 2 | I've been wronged my entire life, and the world owes me. |
| 3 | I have always tried to make the best of a bad situation. |
| 4 | The law doesn't protect the honest and the hard working. I'm going to do whatever needs to be done to make things right. |
| 5 | I'm always in the wrong place at the wrong time. |
| 6 | My superiors are smarter and wiser than I am. I do what I'm told. |
| 7 | Never pass up the opportunity to make an easy bit of coin. That's my motto. |
| 8 | I'm beginning to feel like the gods are not on my side. |
Plaintiff Ideals
| d6 | Ideal |
|---|---|
| 1 | Justice. Those who break the law need to answer for their crimes. (Lawful) |
| 2 | Freedom. People must have the freedom to do what they want and pursue their dreams. (Chaotic) |
| 3 | Greed. Everyone I see is getting theirs, so I'm surely going to get mine. (Evil) |
| 4 | Chaos. You're out of order! And you're out of order! This whole realm is out of order! (Chaotic) |
| 5 | Humility. I'm just a small part of a larger whole. So is everyone else. (Neutral) |
| 6 | Responsibility. We all have our roles to play. I'll hold up my end of the bargain. (Any) |
Plaintiff Bonds
| d6 | Bond |
|---|---|
| 1 | Others hurt in the same accident that hurt me are my new family. I'll make sure they're taken care of. |
| 2 | The rulers of this place were kind to me, and they have my lifelong devotion. |
| 3 | My parents worry about me, but I'll make them proud. |
| 4 | The only bond that matters is the one holding my money pouch to my belt. |
| 5 | The other new hires at Acquisitions Incorporated are my allies. We have each other's backs. |
| 6 | My legal counsel is my best friend. I owe all my forthcoming opportunities to their hard work. |
Plaintiff Flaws
| d6 | Flaw |
|---|---|
| 1 | The person who gains the most reward for the least effort wins. |
| 2 | Three magic beans for just one cow? What a deal! |
| 3 | I have only one vice, but it controls my life. |
| 4 | Sleep is for the weak. We need to keep training more if we're going to be ready for the challenges ahead. |
| 5 | Until my songs are sung in every tavern in this realm, I won't be satisfied. |
| 6 | If people find me unpleasant, that's their problem. |
Should You Be a Plaintiff?
Review by Sam West, Twitter:@CrierKobold
From the Acquisitions Incorporated book, the Plaintiff background really only works in the context of that setting. It is a joke first and foremost, and makes little actual sense as a background where you get features, skills, and abilities. Anyone can be wronged by a corporation and paid off to not talk. That isn’t an entire background, it's an event.
This option barely counts as an option to me- it’s two skills and artisan’s tools with a lawyer feature. If you want to be a lawyer, this could work well enough, but it sure doesn’t justify existing.
Feature: Legalese
Legalese makes no sense. None. The entire point of this background is you’re getting legally scammed by a company. That’s the joke- they hurt you, and instead of wanting you to press for damages, you get an exciting offer to distract you while they deal with the case. This feature is the antithesis of the joke. If this were the feature for a Aquisitions Inc. Lawyer I’d get it.
Outside of the flavor fail, the actual ability can be a blast to mess around with. It's a basic PHB-esque background feature, but encourages your DM to lean into and let you get away with some BS under the guise of legal prowess.
Skills
I’m a big fan of both Medicine and Persuasion.
Persuasion I’m mainly wanting on characters that can regularly make the social checks. You want a +3 or higher with your Charisma for this to regularly put you in the position to socially negotiate, so this option defaults to classes like Bard, Warlock, and Sorcerer.
Medicine is a skill that’s just nice to have, as it helps stabilize dying creatures and can help inform you of incoming dangers by examining wounds of recently maimed or killed creatures.
Other Proficiencies
Proficiency in any artisan’s tools of your choice undeniably is handy. These tools tend to range in usefulness, but any of your choice at least sets you up to have ready to go resources for crafting on the road.
Of the lot, alchemist’s supplies, tinker’s tools, and woodcarver’s tools are my highest rated, but they all will heavily depend on DM flexibility and your creativity with them. They aren’t going to match the kits, though- I rate all of the miscellaneous adventuring supply proficiencies higher than every artisan’s tools proficiency.
Check out the expanded rules in Xanathar’s Guide to Everything if you want some expanded rules that add features to these tools.
Equipment
Given that your background has no unique identity beyond a single event, your equipment is generic. The artisan’s tools you gained proficiency with is a fine addition, and 20 gold is a solid chunk, but nothing here is unique, nor interesting.
Bonus Tables
When your entire background is based on one moment in time, its hard to make traits and ideals that reflect that. This leads to the tables offering personality traits, bonds, ideals, and flaws all instead reflecting being an employee of Acquisitions Inc. Options like “Others hurt in the same accident that hurt me are my new family” tie you to the inciting event that spurred the background- other options are as generic as you can get with stuff like “My parents worry about me, but I’ll make them proud”, which is entirely detached from this concept.
The flaws bug me most- how, at all, is “Until my songs are sung in every tavern in this realm, I won’t be satisfied” related to this? “If people find me unpleasant, that’s their problem” has nothing at all to do with anything happening here.
The majority of outcomes of these tables could apply to literally any character type. Some apply more to other backgrounds than this, and only three or four of the twenty four actually relate to Acquisitions Incorporated and the event that spurred you working for them.
All Together
The Acquisitions Incorporated book has its flaws and some strengths- Plaintiff highlights its flaws to me. This option started as a one note joke, a character scammed by Acquisition Incorporated now works for them as a way to prevent them suing the company. The problem is that the joke has absolutely no business being an entire background. Having a table that could tie characters with regular backgrounds to the company would go a long way.
This option has no business existing, even at tables using the setting and company. Just take a real background, and have your introduction to the company be the joke.
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