Snilloc’s Snowball Swarm: Feel the Cold Wrath of My Balls
Spell Level: 2
School: Evocation
Casting Time: 1 action
Range: 90 feet
Duration: Instantaneous
Components: V, S, M (a piece of ice or a small white rock chip)
A flurry of magic snowballs erupts from a point you choose within range. Each creature in a 5-foot-radius sphere centered on that point must make a Dexterity saving throw. A creature takes 3d6 cold damage on a failed save, or half as much damage on a successful one.
At Higher Levels. When you cast this spell using a spell slot of 3rd level or higher, the damage increases by 1d6 for each slot level above 2nd.
Review by Sam West, Twitter: @CrierKobold
A heated battle blazes before you; an orc takes arrow after arrow, blood erupting from each wound. Unfazed, it raises its blood-soaked blade above you. This looks like the end. Your life flashes before your eyes. Just as the blade comes down towards you, a loose icy ball of powdered snow smacks the orc in the face, interrupting the blow. Then another. Then about two-dozen more, leaving your assailant buried on the ground in a spontaneous snow drift that looks like it belongs in a Calvin and Hobbs comic.
Snilloc’s Snowball Swarm has some of the silliest flavor to me. This is a D&D damage spell at its finest for its appearance; what better way to lock in the wackiness of D&D than confronting an ultimate evil cult leader sacrificing virgins with a wicked knife with a barrage of projectiles most commonly used by elementary school students on a snow day? The images to me are just priceless. This alone gives me reason to consider it.
There is a pretty hefty price for the silliness: the damage. 3d6 cold in a 5 ft. radius area is just atrocious. Burning Hands does the same damage in a better area a full level lower. Aganazzar’s Scorcherr hits a WAY larger area for more damage at the same level. Ice Knife up-cast is hitting for a d10 more, and 3d6 in a larger area. The only real upside Snilloc’s Snowball Swarm has going for it is its 90 ft. range. Besides that, it's functionally worse than every comparative option.
It's a shame such a fun concept of a spell is attached to horrendous numbers. You could quadruple the area here and I’d still say this spell is pretty bad; at just one spell level higher we’re looking at over double the damage at a longer range in over double the area. That doesn’t bode well for old Snilloc, here.
If you love the silliness of D&D, Snilloc’s Snowball Storm will highlight that silliness. There is something to be said for killing a beholder with Frosty the Snowman’s weapon of choice. Outside of the cute thematics, though, there is basically no reason to cast this. If you’re looking for the most bang for your buck, try nearly any other evocation spell.
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