Animate Objects: Be Our Guest

Usable By: Artificer, Bard, Sorcerer, Wizard

Spell Level: 5

School: Transmutation

Casting Time: 1 action

Range: 120 feet

Duration: Concentration, up to 1 minute

Components: V, S

Objects come to life at your Command. Choose up to ten nonmagical Objects within range that are not being worn or carried. Medium Targets count as two Objects, Large Targets count as four Objects, Huge Targets count as eight Objects. You can't animate any object larger than Huge. Each target animates and becomes a creature under your control until the spell ends or until reduced to 0 Hit Points.

As a Bonus Action, you can mentally Command any creature you made with this spell if the creature is within 500 feet of you (if you control multiple Creatures, you can Command any or all of them at the same time, issuing the same Command to each one). You decide what action the creature will take and where it will move during its next turn, or you can issue a general Command, such as to guard a particular Chamber or corridor. If you issue no commands, the creature only defends itself against Hostile Creatures. Once given an order, the creature continues to follow it until its task is complete.

Animated Object Statistics

Tiny - HP: 20, AC: 18, Attack: +8 to hit, 1d4 + 4 damage, Str: 4, Dex: 18

Small - HP: 25, AC: 16, Attack: +6 to hit, 1d8 + 2 damage, Str: 6, Dex: 14

Medium - HP: 40, AC: 13, Attack: +5 to hit, 2d6 + 1 damage, Str: 10, Dex: 12

Large - HP: 50, AC: 10, Attack: +6 to hit, 2d10 + 2 damage, Str: 14, Dex: 10

Huge - HP: 80, AC: 10, Attack: +8 to hit, 2d12 + 4 damage, Str: 18, Dex: 6

An animated object is a Construct with AC, Hit Points, attacks, Strength, and Dexterity determine by its size. Its Constitution is 10 and its Intelligence and Wisdom are 3, and its Charisma is 1. Its speed is 30 feet, if the Objects lack legs or other appendages it can use for locomotion, it instead has a flying speed of 30 feet and can hover. If the object is securely attached to a surface or larger object, such as a chain bolted to a wall, its speed is 0. It has Blindsight with a radius of 30 feet and is blind beyond that distance. When the animated object drops to 0 Hit Points, it reverts to its original object form, and any remaining damage carries over to its original object form.

If you Command an object to Attack, it can make a single melee Attack against a creature within 5 feet of it. It makes a slam Attack with an Attack bonus and bludgeoning damage determine by its size. The DM might rule that a specific object inflicts slashing or piercing damage based on its form.

At Higher Levels: If you cast this spell using a spell slot of 6th Level or higher, you can animate two additional Objects for each slot level above 5th.

Review by Sam West, Twitter @CrierKobold

Animate Objects is the kind of spell you’ll find nearly endless applications for including mass murder. Here are some basic ways to use the spell to its maximum depending on the size of objects you want to animate.

**TLDR:** The highest damage per round option is animating ten tiny objects, while animating medium or larger objects predominantly is used for cover or creative problem solving.

Tiny/Small: These are your bread and butter killing machines. If you give them all the same command, they all can be commanded with the same bonus action. If that command is “kill that creature”, you’ll be making attacks with all remaining weapons until it's dead, or you give them a new command.

Both tiny and small do an average of 65 damage if all ten hit; tiny weapons are slightly better at the murder, while small weapons are a bit chunkier. Up to 65 (10d4+40) damage per round at next to no cost is busted for a 5th level spell. Even if just half hit, you’re dealing 5d4+20 damage, or 32 damage for your BONUS action.

Beyond them being the highest damage options, tiny and small objects under your control for a minute can cover a huge amount of space and menial tasks. Tasks that normally would take you ten minutes could conceivably be done in one minute with the right instructions. Packing up a campsite can be done in a matter of rounds, and cleaning up after a fight could be made insignificant. Animating incriminating objects placing you at the scene of a crime to simply fly away and hide is an easy way to disguise the party’s misdoings from prying eyes.

Medium: Medium objects can be awkward to use. They don’t often provide better cover than their larger object counterparts, and tend to be at their best when used to fill a specific niche. Saddles animated to fly can carry up to five creatures in the air for a minute or five suits of armor in an armory animated to envelop your allies quickly to hide are some examples. Otherwise medium objects just end up being awkward middle of the road options against their smaller and larger competitors.

Large and Huge: Animating a dinner table to surprise the host you’re looking to kill can be a fun moment that turns an encounter on its head. Animating large or huge objects rarely is the best damage option, but can be in the niche cases you’re dealing with monsters that have access to ample area of effect damage.

Otherwise they are giant hit point spongages you can use to create mobile full cover with. Moving behind a huge object that floats 30-60 ft. a round can allow you to cover a ton of space for its hit points. Animating a locked door can give you an easy way to unlock it, animating a spiral staircase to fall over sideways can cut off a path to aid in an escape, and animating a fallen chandelier to get you and your allies up far above the enemies below for a ranged advantage all can make for great memories.

Are these ever likely the most strategically optimal options? Nope! But as a player who loves this spell, the most fun I’ve had with it have been animating huge objects that take everyone by surprise and lead to encounters unlike any other

5e Spells

Animate Objects: Be Our Guest